Missing the feeling of the weekend

You know that feeling you get on a Friday afternoon, that sense of liberation after 5 days of work?
The realization that for the next couple of days, you can do whatever you want?
Or better yet, the ability to just to NOTHING?
(unless you have exams the following week.)

 After a tough and hectic week, it just feels sooo good to be done with the week that sometimes I just wanna shout and yell. All that tiredness and sleepiness that I felt during the week magically disappears, and I am so full of energy. That nap I've been wanting so badly? Screw that. This brief moment of liberty is too precious to be spent on sleep.

Now that I have all the time in the world, it's not the same. What a relative term 'happiness' is.

Just sitting in my house in Fort Lee, doing NOTHING, doing not much else without a car to go anywhere, everyday is same. There is absolutely nothing special about 'Friday' or 'Saturday.'

This just seem so irrational. I've realized this relativity in people's happiness for a while, but it's just so bizarre. I guess this is human nature? Then human nature is irrational. Why can't we be happy with what we have? Seriously.....I should be jumping up and down with joy when I perfectly know that it'd be dreadful to not have free time.

Do we really need to go through hard times just to appreciate the good times?
And as soon as we no longer have hardship, we are so quick to forget what we have is good. Shit...

I miss the feeling of the weekend so much.

Taiwan Visit

8/15 to 8/18/13, Taipei, Taiwan

13년만에 대만으로 돌아갔다. 4일간 엄청 놀았다. 정신없이....시간이 모자랐다.

여러가지것을 했지만 대북한국학교와 청년공원을 가본것이 가장 중요했다.

동해랑 같이갔는데 둘다 봤을때 딱 느낀게 '학교가 이만큼밖에 안컸어?' 였다. 참으로 작았다. 어릴땐 이 운동장이 얼마나 컸는데.....뛰어다니면서 도마뱀 잡고.....

6시 즘에 갔는데 학교 대문은 잠겨있엇다. 아무도 없었다. 방학이어서 그런가?

학교 바로 뒤에있는 우리 집.

등교하던 기억데로 따라 가보니 나왔다. 기분이 참 묘했다. 아침마나 개 똥 피하느라 땅만 보고 다니던 그길.....

(근데 몇층인지는 기억이 잘.....8층? 6층?)

 드디어 꿈에서만 보이던 청년공원을 다시 직접 보게되었다. 조금 조금씩 변했지만 또 많은것들이 기억데로 였다. 학교처럼 모든것이 작아보였지만 지금 봐도 상당히 큰 공원이다. 참 아쉬운건....그 옛날의 연못이 없어젔다는것.....그냥 벽돌바닥의 공터였다...헐ㄹㄹ 이럴수가....거기서 올챙이 잡고 자라 잡고 민물 게도 있었는데...

대만 아침이다. 4일간 너무 많은것을 맛으로, 냄새로 돌아왔다. 이름이다 눈으로는 기억이 잘 안나는것도 먹어보면, 아....이맛! 기억나! 했다. 그리고 길가다 나는 냄새들도 마찬가지....참으로 신기하고 묘한 4일이었다. 언제 또 와보나.....이번엔 13년이나 안 걸리길......

Summer 2013

To reflect back on my college senior year, it wasn't the best.
I finished alright, but it was so hard mentally. I just read my previous post, and it sounds as if I was depressed haha. (or maybe I was at the time...) Maybe because I had such an awesome summer (South Africa, bicycle tour) coming into senior year, everything seemed unimportant and menial. I felt like I was wasting time. Even when friends wanted to hang out, everything sounded so lame. So I became lame and did nothing. Meh. Did not like the way I spent my last year. Could have been much more fun.

Now I have been working as an intern at Fasoo.com in Korea. Its been about a month and a half now. At first, everything was new, so it was quite interesting. Now, its just boring again. I don't wanna go to work. It's really hard trying to stay awake for 8 hours a day when I have lost all interest in what I do I work. I don't know what's wrong with me.

I do enjoy participating in Fasketball (Fasoo company basketball club). It's held every Monday at a middle school gym, and I can't believe Monday has become the day I look most forward to. I'm always disappointed at my performance because I think I can do better,  but its fun. I think it helped me to improve my court vision. I am dreading the last 3 weeks of internship, yet I am saddened that I have only 3 Mondays left with Fasketball. sigh.....

I also enjoyed getting to know the two interns that sit near me in our team. 창원 and 재성. They are in their Junior year, but a year older than me. But that's fine, since I'm used to being friends with 90s. They told me a lot of stories about their experiences in the army.

I can't believe how busy I have been lately, in Korea. I thought I would be so bored, with not many friends around, but I've been surprisingly busy. Meeting up with few friends I have, 회식, relatives, etc. I should look for China jobs, but I just wanna rest and do nothing because I'm so tired all the time.

I should write more often. Cheers.